Chicago Bulls Deserve Flowers this Season

At the end of the year, when the Bulls hoist the championship trophy to the sky, instead of t-shirts and trendy hats stating they won, they should hoist flowers and wear flowers. Why? Because of...

Flowers man....just flowers. Trott Felipe smells them, gives them to girls he courts, and wears them. Awesome!

Have you ever heard of the corpse flower? That's right, most people haven't. Well, of course Trott Felipe knows about it, but he's Trott Felipe. It's, quite simply, the world’s most foul-smelling flower that puts a smell that is so bad, it's like rotting fish and meat combined! Lots of people flocked to the totally awesome Brooklyn Botanic Garden on Friday to see what this big "stink" (haha, hehe te hehe hey-yo!) was about. And you know what they found? They found the rare blooming of a cultivated amorphophallus titanum. Which is also one of the world’s largest flowers.Chris Michaud from Reuters had this to say: “I had to wear a respirator.” Man, now that's what I call a sticky situation!...I mean, a smelly situation. Also, Alessandro Chiari, a plant propagator who, along with garden foreman Mark Fisher were responsible for raising the flower from a pea-sized tuber to maturity said, “It comes in waves," of the plant’s horrible, foul smell. The smell actually serves the purpose of attracting hungry bees and insects that pollinate its female flowers. Apparently, bees like smells that suck.

It's also called a titan arum and NO, it does not pollinate itself you silly little uneducate hahahah. In full bloom one of the air technicians said the smell made her eyes water and the greenhouse’s windows had to be opened for ventilation. The aroma peaked during the wee hours when the garden was closed and some people were almost disappointed to miss it's strongest point. “It’s actually a very organic kind of smell,” said Adam Husted of Brooklyn. “I don’t know if it’s really putrid though.” Apparently Adam has no nostrils. Just kidding, hey-yo!

Crowds snapped photos and sniffed the plant a lot. One visitor even said they were “kind of relieved.” The last time this flower, native to Sumatra, bloomed was in New York in 1939. That's pretty sweet. Only a handful have even been in the U.S. in the last few decades mayne.“It’s such a beautiful thing,” Fisher said of what he gently calls his “baby.” It was raised in a North Carolina nursery. In a freakish way, it resembles an appealing love child of a crenelated cabbage and a calla lily. And guess what else? It buds each year before going dormant! Bears ain't got ish on these plants! Fisher said that a leaf reached 18 feet tall last summer. The corpse flowers blooming is short though and then it dies 2 to 3 days. But the garden’s experts have obtained pollen and will manually pollinate “baby.”

If that's successful...well...that's what we call a miracle folks, and the seeds are distributed to other nursery's and stuff. Also, if you were wondering, victorian women used to be kept from seeing this flower back in the day.

Paintball Gear:

Seriously though, at the Emmys I'm surprised Barry Manilow didn't come out in cheap paintball gear.

Serially friends, have you ever wondered about the history of paintball guns? Well, sit down bros, and listen to some knowledge mayne. Paintball guns, in all their awesomeness, were originally used by the forestry and farming industries to mark trees and cattle. Isn't that crazy?! These early paintball guns were similar to many paintball pistols of today. Now, I can't believe that they were. But they were! They were powered by CO2 cartridges but they had poor range, not to mention mediocre accuracy. The tree-marking paintball guns had to be modified in order to reduce their velocity to prevent injury to humans. Isn't that crazy!? Generally, the evolution of paintball gun technology is focused on achieving greater speed, accuracy, and air efficiency.Paintball guns will probably continue to evolve as new technologies are developed to make them ever smaller, lighter, more accurate, and more air-efficient. How sick is that?! So now, you can check out Zephyrpaintball.com. Mayne, they were founded in 2004. They had the original idea of bringing low prices, customer service and fast shipping to the paintball world. Zephyr Paintball has Paintball Guns from all the top manufacturers. Awesome. This includes: Smart parts, Kingman Spyder, Proto, Tippman, and More. And guess what else? They will match competitors prices on all of their in stock Paintball guns! Awesome!

Bridesmaids...Holla!

I hope you like bridesmaid gifts. If not, you should.

Weddings are fun again. Not sure when they were, but I'm sure at some point in the history of the world they were, and they are again. Couples today are getting revved up for the big day in backyards, bowling alleys, and on beaches. Awesome!

These new, improved wedding idea, standout and will please everybody in the family, trust me. Even Grandma will be leaning back. You should try planning your wedding with a theme consistent with the honeymoon. If you are going somewhere tropical, check these ideas that I heard about:

1. BBQ Bash If this wedding is superformal, this might be a good way to relax at the rehearsal dinner. Burgers, dogs and baked beans can really bring the two families together. People can talk casually at picnic tales. Use the potluck method to help everybody bring a dessert in. Decorate tables with wildflowers in galvanized tin pails and jars of homemade jam laid out on red-and-white checkered tablecloths. For favors, give out BBQ sauce, “Kiss the Chef” aprons, or personalized ketchup bottles! Hey-yo! Also, use anti-mosquito candles man.

2. The Orient Express Fusion helps. Bring in a Chinese restaurant cater dinner or hire a sushi chef, and you could even serve mini-pad thais as an appetizer. Colorful paper lanterns and parasols help ornate origami. Festive décor is just one trip to Chinatown or a party supply store. Use exotic and fragrant orchids, colorful lotus blossoms or just fanciful origami creations for centerpieces and conversation pieces too.

3. Go for a Dip Fondue adds fun to any meal! Start with toast points and various cheese pots. If you were wondering, blue cheese or Gruyere are good starters. Then use meats, potatoes, and veggies, which can each be dipped in sauces (like teriyaki, red wine, and even ginger) and cooked right on there on the table. Dip fresh fruit, squares of firm cake and brownies, bananas, and marshmallows in pots of melted chocolate, caramel, marshmallow, honey, and yogurt if you are looking for great desserts!

4. Let the Good Times Bowl Remember Big Lebowski? It has nothing to do with this but this theme could be huge fun -- and sends a clear, casual attire message if your guests don't have nice clothes. Some alleys have private rooms. They can be used to serve food. The menu is quite easy: microwave pizza or delivery, nachos, pretzels, and foods from the snack bar. Have competitions between the families, or do boys vs. girls, and give awards at the end of the night. Winners receive a bowling shirt embroidered with “Team Pat & Chris,” while everyone else takes home sugar cookies iced and shaped like bowling balls or pins.

5. Feelin’ Lucky? Do a casino night and send out invitations on customized playing cards. Decorate surfaces with chocolate poker chips! Let thebridal party take turns dealing blackjack, poker, and other card games or you can hire a dealer too. Keep the champagne flowing and the gambling going.

6. A Party You Can Really Dig Fresh seafood with all the New England fixin’s at a traditional clambake! Go to the beach for authenticity or have your own landlocked version. Put buckets filled with seashells and sea shaped candies on the tables homie.

7. Welcome to the Big League Proclaim the wedding festivities officially underway with an excursion to a local stadium or baseball field for some hot dogs, peanuts, cracker jacks and crackers. Get a group rate, announce the party on the scoreboard and get everybody customized hats.

8. Toast of the Town Throw a wine tasting party and watch the snobs appear. Select six to eight different wines of all the same grape varietal (do all Shiraz, or all chardonnay, etc.) so guests can really taste the difference a winemaker and a vineyard makes! Present the different wines with cheese they go with. cool. Decorate the whole place with grapes and wine bottles and give everybody one.

9. Destination Theme If you are going somewhere tropical, decorate the party like that place, for Hawaii, Jimmy Buffet and surfboards. For Puerto Rico, hispanic music and posters of Orlando Magic point guard Carlos Arroyo will suffice.

10. Tee Time If your couple loves the links. Set up a tee time and a tournament for your wedding party. Then have a party at the clubhouse afterwards. Drink a lot, awesome!